Friday, 29 March 2013

fleamarket

 Went to a fleamarket today with my mother.

I got a pair of salt and pepper shakers,
a crossword book,
a sleeveless top,
a shirt,
two spoons and two forks,
and some poppy seeds and cumin seeds.

salt and pepper shakers:
The salt top is sadly much more worn than the pepper one,
but nothing to do about that.
They are still sweet,
and I have been looking for a pair of shakers.

-----------------
I am doing well 
(did I just write that?)
Been cooking dinner for myself for a couple of days,
have been cleaning up after myself as well.
Both something I usually do not do.
At all.
It has helped though,
that I have had some days without all of the stupid thoughts,
and all that jazz.
Its a rather odd feeling, 
but I must admit that things look more bright that ever.

Wednesday, 6 March 2013

Ode to my depression

I am doing pretty well to tell you the truth.
BUT, I have lost my main passion : creativity.
I do not know why, now that I am indeed better, my depression steels my creativity.
It is a mystery

Before I continue, 
I should tell,
 that I 4½ years ago,
 went down with a depression and social phobia.
And since then, 
I have suffered from Dysthymia and social phobia.
Until I 1 year ago decided to get hospitalized and get help. 
Which is why I am now better.

Ode to my Depression
I am claming that I am better than I have been for years.
And that is the truth.
The depression is but almost gone.
My faithful companion has gone and left me!
With no lingering goodbyes or anything.
It just upped and left.
And I feel rather lost without it to tell you the truth.
It may sound weird, but so it is.
I am left with nothing.
I am grasping at thin air, 
trying to grope my way through life,
without my faithful companion.
One could claim that a depression is no fit companion,
but is all I ever had.
And I had grown rather fond of it.
I knew it ever so well, and it knew me.
really,
What am I without my depression?!